After waiting three months, a diner at Cardano’s staff canteen has finally received a fork.
Nick Garcia, a programmer at the blockchain, explained how the saga unfolded.
“Normally I eat a sandwich at my desk, but back in the summer I decided to eat in the staff canteen for a change. Anyway, I chose the Bolognese option, carried my tray to the cutlery station, but there was no fork. And you can’t eat spaghetti with just a knife, right?
“The lady in the canteen said, ‘The fork is coming’, so I waited. And I waited. 10 minutes turned into 20. Into 30. I’m thinking, ‘Come on, I’ve got stuff to do here.’ After an hour my food was cold and I was getting pretty hangry but they kept saying, ‘We know you’re waiting for a fork. Don’t worry, it’s coming.’”
When the canteen was due to close at 5, Garcia made an unusual choice. “At Cardano, our core values are transparency and honesty. I was a told a fork was coming, so I took them at their word, even if that meant staying ‘til morning.”
Three months later, he was still waiting.
“Every day I asked when the fork was coming and every day there was a different excuse. Mostly about there being a bug on it. I asked why they couldn’t just remove the bug, but they said that was easier said than done. People asked me why I didn’t just eat somewhere else. There’s a nice ice cream place across the road called Solana, but I guess I’m stubborn. Or stupid.”
Holding back the tears, Garcia explained the sacrifices he had endured after three months in a canteen. “I missed a lot. My kid was born. Grandpa passed. I’ve lost so much weight my shorts keep falling down. But I wasn’t going to leave until that Goddamn fork came.”
That day was yesterday when Garcia could finally tuck into the rancid, three-month-old meal in front of him. “I didn’t even get an apology. They just plonked a fork down and said ‘enjoy’. I’m very loyal to this blockchain but I’m seriously considering not leaving a tip.”
In response, Head Chef Charles Hoskinson told Planet Crypto, “We have a policy of thoroughly testing all cutlery before it’s put in the hands of diners, and sometimes that can lead to delays. But I’m confident that the fork will make Mr Garcia’s Bolognese faster and more efficient to eat than attempting to use two ketchup packets as chopsticks or rolling up the menu into some kind of food pipe. I call that progress.”
Ironically, Nick Garcia was in charge of delivering Cardano’s much-delayed Vasil upgrade, which he refused to work on until he’d eaten.
…. BREAKING NEWS – Nick Garcia admitted to hospital for emergency pump and dump…..
