Like many twins, the bond between Cameron and Tyler Winklevoss is so close they’ve even made up a language that only they understand. It may sound a lot like English, but the meaning is completely different.
Fortunately, we’ve been able to decipher the secret messages their gobbledigook. Here are some of their pronouncements around the failure of their Gemini Earn partnership with Genesis that has left 340,000 of their customers unable to withdraw $900 million.
“Returning your funds is our highest priority and we are operating with the utmost urgency.”
They meant: “Don’t mention that we could easily pay customers back ourselves and then sue Genesis separately. Zip those lips, bro.”
On Barry Silbert of Genesis, they said: “Despite having earned more than a billion dollars in fees – all at the expense of Gemini lenders – Barry refused to take responsibility.”
They meant: “Hey, if we make Barry out to be the greedy bad guy, they might forget that we’re greedy bad guys too. Let’s do it bro, so excited!”
“Gemini has no exposure to FTT tokens or Alameda and no material exposure to FTX.”
They meant: “The only exposure we have is to Genesis… and their exposure to Alameda and FTX is their business. That’s like, totally logical, right bro?”
“Genesis was willing to recklessly lend to 3AC”
They meant: “I think we blew off our due diligence on Genesis to go shopping for identical clothes, remember? Totally worth it though, you rock that sailor’s outfit, bro!”
“This evening, Genesis filed for bankruptcy under Chapter 11. This is a crucial step towards us being able to recover your assets.”
They meant: “Ha! They’ll get 10% back in 5 years if they’re lucky. Game of squash later, bro?”