An announcement from your friendly Chinese government!
Free citizens of China! Your friendly Chinese government has made travelling by public transport in Shandong Province more convenient than ever, because now you can pay by Digital Yuan, the Central Bank Digital Currency (CBDC) created and controlled by your friendly Chinese government!
Paying by CBDC makes travelling by bus or subway convenient*.
- Worried about getting to the pro-democracy demonstration on time? Worry no more! When we freeze the your funds for troublemaking, you won’t be able to travel anyway!
- Not sure if the bus you’re on goes to the secret pro-democracy meeting? No problem! When you let us track which bus you’re on through your payments, we’ll decide the destination for you! Popular detours include prison, the labour camp, and the re-education centre.
- Annoyed by people on the subway putting their feet on the seats or playing music? When we block their ability to buy food for 6 months, such anti-social behaviour will become a thing of the past. As will they!
So as you can see, paying your fare by CBDC makes everything so much easier, especially for us, your friendly Chinese government!
So why not download the CBDC app to your phone today and sign up? To make it easy, we’ve already downloaded it to your phone, and already signed you up.
With thanks from your friendly Chinese government. Remember our motto, “You’d have to travel a long way to find a better government. Not that we’d let you, of course.”
*’convenient’ = ‘convenient for your friendly Chinese government.’
