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Bitcoin maximalists have hit out at the growing ‘Ordinals’ craze that has seen artists embed their work as NFTs within transactions on the blockchain.

“They’re completely missing the point of Bitcoin which is that it has no point at all”, said Bitcoin purist, Grayson Killjoy. “Bitcoin isn’t meant to be used to pay for things, or create utility, or add beauty to the world. That’s what Ethereum is for and is why I hate Ethereum.”

“No, the beauty of Bitcoin is that every Satoshi is created equal. ie. is equally pointless. Imagine the world these artistic rebels want to create where you innocently buy a few Satoshis and then find that by chance they have an inspiring work of art embedded in them. That would be AWFUL. It would be like buying the Mona Lisa and finding a cash bonus taped to the back. Or asking the teller at the bank if they have something for you to carry your substantial cash withdrawal in and they hand you the Shroud of Turin… exactly, it wouldn’t be what you asked for and would therefore be extremely annoying.”

“Bitcoin is digital gold and should keep the same ethos of complete impracticality”, continued Grayson Killjoy. “In fact, Bitcoin is better than gold which was ruined when it became associated with pointless things like love, marriage, and adorning the human form. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to propose to my ladyfriend and place a warm onion ring on her finger.”